Can I Enjoy My Kids Fighting?

I grew up as an only child, no brother and no sisters.   People with siblings wish they were only children.  I wish I wasn't.  We always want what we don't have.  I now have 4 kids of my own, ages 17-9.  While writing that I can't believe it.  It seems like yesterday they were babies and we had more diapers than anyone would care to mention.  As my kids are growing up they are becoming great friends and mortal enemies all at once.  How many times I would say I wish they would just get along.  On one vacation my second oldest son and my daugher (#4), were fighting as usual.  By the end of the night we rented a movie and who was sitting together and eating popcorn in a chair-not even a couch, but a somewhat over-sized chair-but these 2 rivals.

So why do I ask if I can enjoy my kids fighting?  There are 2 reasons off the top of my head.
One is a lesson to learn from them.  You can fight with someone and still have a friendship, still accept each other for who they are.  Obviously they do not hate each other or they wouldn't be sitting so close enjoying popcorn.   We may not like everything about a person but we can appreciate what we do have in common and relish in that.

The other is the more my kids fight now the better equipped they will be to stand up for themselves later on with people not in their immediate family.   It doesn't mean they will be bullies, it means they will less likely be pushovers.  This is their training ground.  They will have years of experience and maturity under their belt that I did not have in this area when they face the world beyond their front door.  As an only child, I complied for the most part, no I wasn't an angel but things were relatively peaceful in my house.  I only had a dog to fight with and blame things on (which didn't go over).

So even though it drives me crazy at times, if I look at their fighting in this respect, I can actually sit back and smile.  Its one thing you can't learn in a book!