Its always heartbreaking to hear of a marriage that is breaking up; it hurts the couple, their children, their family and their friends. We especially hear the "d" word in Hollywood on a regular basis. While I don't follow what goes on with tv and the movies and the gossip rags, I always thought of Arnold and Maria as a cool couple, they both seemed to really love and support each other through all of their differences. Well, we just never know what goes on behind closed doors, only what the headlines at the checkout counter tell us. However, we can control what goes on behind our closed doors.
When my husband and I were about to get married we were given advice by the clergy who married us, it was a matter of one word: communication. Always keep the lines of communication open. Express your feeling-the guys as well as the girls. Say what is on your mind.
Lately we have been running in so many circles that my husband I have not had much time for each other. With 4 kids, homeschooling, Hebrew School, errands, and activities its no wonder. We expressed this one day and realized a change had to be made. While most couples make a date night, this was not possible for us (at the time) so we decided to make a date morning. Sunday morning the kids get dropped off to Hebrew School and we have almost 3 hours together! We go for a bagel (cheaper than a dinner) and then to Barnes and Noble across the street (we both love books) or where ever we decided to go and this was our time together. It gives us time to talk without interruption. Its been so nice knowing we had this time coming up together, but we would never have had this come about if we hadn't expressed the need to have time together. Had we just grumbled to ourselves there could be a problem down the road.
People get married to stay married, so what is it that is causing divorce to be so rampant these days? I think we were given the right advice 19 years ago, communication. We need to talk to each other, stay close, express ourselves and truly listen to each other. Its not easy but our spouse comes before our children. If our children see we have a strong marriage than they will feel secure. They need to see we care about each others thoughts, ideas, and feelings. It all comes down to dialogue, discussion, conversation-----communication.
Adventuresome Me
- Tamar Ruth
- Who I started out as is not who I have become! I grew up in a small town, very small...and all I wanted to do was move to the city. Now as an adult that small town has grown and is overcrowded. I want what I had as a kid...small town living. We don't appreciate what we have until it is gone. I water my plants with my rain barrel water,grow veggies in the front yard and want chickens and goats in the worst way. I married my high school sweetheart and after 18 years of marriage converted to Judaism. Did I mention I have 4 kids and I homeschool? My oldest son just graduated! The purpose of this blog is to share my experiences--homeschooling, being Jewish and loving it in a not so Jewish town, gardening, animals, and alternative medicines. So, if any of these things interest you---come along for the ride!
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